It is strongly advised that they remain focused on themselves until their sobriety is strong.
Once they are settled in their new life, they can then begin to consider sharing it with somebody else.
“'Two sickies don’t make a welly,’ my 80-year-old sponsor used to say.” According to James, a 33-year-old photographer from Los Angeles who’s been sober for eight years, when he first came to AA he listened to what his sponsor told him and religiously avoided dating women in the program.
He didn’t date anyone at all for the first six months—he was in a Salvation Army men’s rehab anyway, so it wasn't like he had much of a choice.
I guess I still liked hanging around screwed up people, even if I wasn’t using. I still found something sexy about it.”The Big Book doesn’t specifically state that dating is forbidden in the first year of sobriety, but you’ll hear this suggestion bandied around the rooms plenty of times. Christine Milrod, a sex and life coach in LA, suggests that this is because “many people in recovery have previously used for so long that they have no idea of who they truly are.
I would appreciate any words of wisdom in regards to dating.The first few months of recovery are often described as an emotional rollercoaster because there is so much going on.The last thing that an individual will want to do will be to add the stress of a new relationship to the mix.During the past two decades, I’ve dated both men in recovery and men who weren’t alcoholics (called “normies” by us in the program).I’m currently single again, a sober divorcée in the strange world of online dating. How do you allude to your past (and present) situations without lying or scaring off a potential match?It is recommended that people who are still within the first year of their recovery should avoid beginning romantic relationships.